Finding the Freedom to Live

Life in Christ frees us to build intimacy with integrity

  • About
  • Resources
  • Themes
  • Contact
Copyright © 2025
[Privacy Policy]
[Terms of Service]
You are here: Home / Quotes / Obedience in marriage is discernment and love — St John Chrysostom

Obedience in marriage is discernment and love — St John Chrysostom

22 May 2018 By Andrew Leave a Comment

St John Chrysostom

Share this:

  • Click to share on X (Opens in new window) X
  • Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window) Facebook

When we speak of the wife obeying the husband, we normally think of obedience in military or political terms: the husband giving orders and the wife obeying them. But while this type of obedience may be appropriate in the army, it is ridiculous in the intimate relationship of marriage. The obedient wife does not wait for orders. Rather, she tries to discern her husband’s needs and feelings, and responds in love. When she sees her husband is weary, she soothes him; when he is ill, she nurses and comforts him; when he is happy and elated, she shares his joy.

Yet such obedience should not be confined to the wife. The husband should be obedient in the same way. When she is weary, he should relieve her of her work; when she is sad, he should cherish her, holding her gently in his arms; when she is filled with good cheer, he should also share her good cheer. Thus a good marriage is not a matter of one partner obeying the other, but of both partners obeying each other.

— Robert Van de Weyer (ed.): /On Living Simply: The Golden Voice of John Chrysostom/

Share this:

  • Click to share on X (Opens in new window) X
  • Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window) Facebook

Related

Leave a ReplyCancel reply

Get the book

Keep in touch

Listen to the podcast

A peaceful heart comes from perfect devotion to God’s will – St Anthony of Optina Share on X
A peaceful heart is acquired from perfect devotion to the will of God, without which we have nothing. And if your husband is really not good,… [ Read more ]
–St Anthony of Optina

Search FtL

Our facebook page

Our facebook page

Follow us on Twitter

Post Tags

pornographyiconographyaddictionsexualitypassionsmarriagetemptationfreedomrepentancecrossprayerconfessionfantasysaintsfamilycommunion